I am in a slump. This happens from time to time, usually after a big event in my life or career. And although I know from past experience that I will probably be on the upswing shortly, every time I’m here at the bottom, I am petrified that I have nothing more to offer.
When I was still life coaching, I counseled my clients to be patient with slumps. I said that slumps were the mind’s way of making room for the birth of new ideas. And I still believe that’s true. But when you’re in a slump, patience is the most difficult thing in the world—not because it is so very hard, but because we assume that patience is doing nothing, that patience is about sitting on our hands and waiting.
This assumption, however, is wrong. While patience is steadfastness and self-control in the face of provocation and delay, it is definitely not idleness. Nowhere in the dictionary does it say that patience equals time standing still.
So friends, against all assumptions to the contrary, the best thing to do when you’re stuck in a slump is to exhibit patience—by doing something. Now, before you go out and buy barrels full of absinthe and gin as “something” to weather out the storm, be warned that patience is not the same as avoidance and denial. I have learned this the hard way, so believe me when I say that being “actively patient” does not mean ignoring the wait, drowning out the wait, or becoming victim to the wait. It is simply making the wait worthwhile.
The first thing I do when I’m in a slump is remove the unnecessary from my calendar. I postpone coffee dates and errands until I can get some perspective on what I’m waiting for exactly. Contrary to what you might be thinking, this is not idleness or avoidance—it’s reassessment, and it is at the very heart of getting out of a slump. It forces me to recharge my mental and emotional batteries, which are often depleted after firing at 100% when I was at the top of my game.
Sometimes this reassessment feels like muck—it’s a sloshing through, it is replete with tears and snot and it isn’t pretty. But I’m pretty sure it’s necessary, because after the muck, after I’ve gotten to the gooey center of things and found out exactly where my new normal is—then comes the fun.
The fun part about being patient in a slump is that it gets your brain churning in new ways. Once you understand that patience is active and all about self control, you get to control exactly what activities to do to get your brain moving again. This is the part of the slump I am currently in. This time, the activity I choose is writing, something I haven’t had the pleasure of doing all summer. It’s a quiet sort of churning, but really, you are allowed to be as bold or timid as you’d like in picking your activities. After all, patience is all about self control.
My slump before this was undone by turning my living room into a giant ball pit. I ordered thousands of rainbow colored balls and filled my home with them. What had once been reserved for childhood and Chuck E. Cheese’s had a little revival in my apartment. Sounds silly, but in between the jumping in and throwing of and inviting friends over for a swim through my sea of rainbow colored play balls, my brain had time to recharge the parts that were slumped.
I can tell that this slump I’m in is about to be over, because my neurons are firing in new ways, unrelated to my initial problem. Had I fallen victim to the belief that all one can do during a slump is stand idly by wallowing in distraction, I may have never gotten this far. To tell you the truth, although I’m happy to be nearly out of this one, I’m kind of looking forward to my next slump. After all, I have a closet full of rainbow colored play balls, and I’m looking forward to figuring out what to do with them next.
Melissa Pierce is a recovering Chicago life coach who loves to interrupt the monotony of the everyday with irreverently silly adventures and meaningful short term projects. She is the founder of four organizations, CWDevs, Pitch Refinery, Where are the Women, and Life in Perpetual Beta Films. She recently changed the title of her business cards to read "Full Time Thrill Designer."
My husband is in a slump at work. He knows he is lucky he has a job, however he hasn't had a pay increase in 3 years. He has taken on more and more work over the years. It sucks cause it's a great company but he is going to have to leave.he'll get over thou.
This is such a great reminder. It's so easy to think that what we most have to do in a slump is hurry & get out as fast as we can, but sometimes we need that very slump to move us in a new direction, re-ignite our creativity, or even help us get a fresh perspective.
Smiling to myself as I read your article and the synchronicity with my present slump. I share your suggestions in riding with slumps rather then feeling guilty or anxious. I am in the flow of it now. For me journaling is a great source for going deeper allowing space for creativity and ideas to emerge..
Writing is something I too haven't done much of lately. And while journaling the other day the idea of writing again came up. Not with any particular agenda or theme. Just write and notice what shows up.
I enjoyed your article and added support it gives to "slumping"!
Of all the suggestions/inquiries/assignments that I have come up with when brainstorming with my clients (or myself) in a sales slump, this one never came up!
Love the colored balls in the living room... this is new and fresh! Thanks for an inspiring post.
Barb Girson
Amen. Amen. Amen. Have been experiencing this for a while and instinctively kind of climbed out of 'things to do' to 'things I want to do' and it has been great. I, too, feel like the slump is coming to an end but will let it ride it's course. Thanks so much for the wise words!!
I'm with you on clearing the calendar and working through it when experiencing the slump. I also try to literally work it out, diving more into the things I love, like yoga or an intense cardio session. Getting in the kitchen and chopping/dicing/making a mess!
Love the ball pit in the living room solution! It reminds me of this comic: http://xkcd.com/150/
I've also recently gotten a lot more 'handy'
I've taken to restoring furniture and doing other "physical / mechanical" things that I never did before.
I've learned how to fix things up and make nice looking things out of other peoples junk.
It's such a far stretch from the "intellectual" work that I do on a day to day basis (marketing and software development) that I find it very rewarding and a great way to let my mind think about other things while I'm working with my hands.
There's something satisfying about actually "making something" that you can touch and feel and look at in a way that you can't when all your work consists of bits and bytes.
My slumps look an awful lot like sitting on the deck for days with coffee, staring out into the yard... I feel like Brian Wilson minus the bed...
I recently lost a job (a contract unexpectedly cancelled). After moping around for a week, I decided that I needed a project, any project, to occupy my brain. Rather than do something related to my job in software, I chose to build a workshop in my basement. Not anything elaborate, just a bench, some tools, and pegboard. To my surprise, the satisfaction of this week long, hands on construction gave me such a great feeling of satisfaction that I felt more confident on interviews and the draining tasks that go with job hunting. It was very therapeutic. The mind needs to feel successes, even if it's a pegboard of tools... or a ball pit in the living room.
